I was headed across the country
Driving through farming land
When my car sputtered to a stop
With no one around to lend a hand

I tried to start my engine again
But only heard that familiar sound
And I looked up and down the highway
But, no gas stations could be found

Just then a tractor pulled up
And off jumped a farmer to save my day
He asked if I'd had car trouble
Or if I'd lost my way

I informed him of my plight
And to his judgment I did yield
As he hooked up a chain to my car
And towed me across his field

I said to him "nice farm"
He replied, "Thanks, I got it at an auction"
"Have any spare diesel?" I then inquired
He said he makes his own concoction

I followed him to his barn
Not sure yet of what I'd find
I thought this supposed diesel-making farmer
Had surely lost his mind

He gave me a brief run-through
About how the corn he raises turns to oil
And with this machine he manufactures
Diesel that grows from his own soil

I stood there in amazement
I stood there dazed with shock
Then my brain, it started to think
And my mouth, it began to talk

I told him I thought he was a genius
And that his machine defied explanation
How people would come from miles around
To make their own fuel from vegetation

I told him we'd be rich
How rich I didn't mention
But I told him we should market
His home fuel making invention

The farmer squinted his eyes and looked at me
And leaned on an old oil drum
He scratched his chin and then he said
"Boy, are you just dumb?"

He informed me that "it's nothing new"
"After all, Lotsa people are doin' it"
He even told me of a place I could order
My own fuel processing unit

He claimed it wasn't that hard to make
And it'd been around for ages
He said cars and trucks had long used it
In all their various stages

He explained to me how it was produced
And how current fuel trucks were already designed to haul it
He explained everything up to that point
Everything, except what did he call it?

"Biodiesel", he said to me
At first, I thought he might be teasing
"My whole farm, it runs on it –
And the smells so gosh-darned pleasing"

Well, I learned a lot of info that day
I learned I could make it or just buy it
He even filled up my tank complimentary
So I could go ahead and try it

Well, I drove away and fell in love
And bought more in every state
You too should give it a try real soon
He was right, it smells just great

Soon gasoline may be obsolete
Kind of like the mule
But, I'll be thankful I ran out of gas
Near that farmer who made his own fuel

Ode To Biodiesel-
Or, Why Does Your Car Smell Like Fries?

Biodiesel, Biodiesel, I make it at my house
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, I needed permission from my spouse
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, the word just flows from my lips
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, and my car smells like potato chips

My fuel doesn't ride, tossing all about
In big oil tankers, not built too stout
Not that it would matter, or be a big deal
If a shipwreck caused a Biodiesel spill

I used to hate, my drive to work
I'd get real mad, drive like a jerk
But now I drive, calm as can be
Helping our environment, can't you see?

With…

Biodiesel, Biodiesel, it's my environmental shield
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, my fuel grows in a farmer's field
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, man, who could even think it?
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, and it won't kill me if I accidentally drink it!

My mama always scolded me
"Eat your veggies", so said she
That's what she said, since the day I was born
And now my car, it runs on corn

When gas prices drop, some people do jump
And head on down to the local gas pump
What do I think?  I think it's kind of dumb
I just fill up my tank from my 50 gallon drum

Of…

Biodiesel, Biodiesel, no matter what your gender
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, on my first batch I used a blender
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, I hope Exxon and Mobil feel rejected
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, anyone know how my warranty is affected?

Some people might say, weird things about you
Hey, don't stress, what're you gonna do?
Just let 'em talk, let 'em tell their lies
While you drive by smelling just like fries

Do we use too much oil? Maybe, duh!
We're probably too dependent on Arabia
We'd be better off, from Utah to Ohio
If drivers got together and demanded more Bio!

As in…

Biodiesel, Biodiesel, Excuse me, while I drive behind this diner
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, A vat of used grease; not much could be finer
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, Gotta go now, I got a red hot date
Biodiesel, Biodiesel, She loves the fact my fuel isn't coming from Kuwait

As far as tasty fruit is concerned
I'm of the opinion that apples, you just can't beat 'em
And whomever planted all these apple trees
I'd surely like to surely meet 'em

From Washington to New York
And scattered all over in between
America grows the best apples
That the world's ever seen

And so many types to choose from
More now than when times were olden
Back then there was mainly just red
Or now and then maybe golden

If you have a diet that features apples
It'll most likely shrink your fanny
So eat a Gala, a Fuji, or a Braeburn
Or perhaps a bright green Granny

Which way to eat 'em, you may wonder
And what dishes pass the test
So many different ways to prepare them
And all of them are tied for best

You could do an old-fashioned apple pie
It'd taste better than a bowl of chicken noodle
And Apple Crisp is always nice
Or a well-made Apple Streudel

The natural goodness of the apple
the quality of it cannot be faked
Whether eaten raw right from the tree
Or from the oven gently baked

Sliced into wedges and put in a bowl
May be the method that you pick
But the way I like best is covered in caramel
Then eaten off a wooden stick

As you can guess, I'm a fan of this fruit
I think apples are the best thing goin'
And when moved to tell how I feel
My praise for them keeps flowin'

So thank you to all the orchardists
I only wish that there were more
Because when it comes to apples
I simply love them to the core